Coke

by jgr80

I'm generally a vegetarian. I became one because of the energy it takes to make meat compared to grains and vegetables. The world is in an energy crisis; I just think it's responsible. Not so much because I grow a wet one over animal welfare (and although I believe that's a valid reason for being a vegetarian, it has never made me one). A friend was surprised recently that I would keep coke in a cupboard at my place since vegetarians obviously have such a healthy lifestyle.

First off, just because someone doesn't eat meat doesn't mean they don't eat cheez-whiz and oreos.

Second, just because I'm a vegetarian doesn't mean I don't need mix.

Third, I keep coke around the house, but not for drinking. No, no. That would be gross.

1. I went to St.F.X and wear the ring proudly. Coke cleans it off whenever it loses its luster.
2. Coke cleans the grime and filth and stains off my pants whenever I'm working with grease or get grass-stains.
3. A little coke will cure my upset stomach during a hangover.
4. The internet tells me it does plenty of other medicinal things for stomachs, which I didn't know before I found out I wasn't allowed to have the stuff because of vegetarianism. Coke apparently cures diarrhea, flatulence, and constipation. (Sorry about the picture... but its just too fitting)
   
5. The internet also says that coke will strip the paint off of metal and clean blood off of clothes. Awesome.
   

This video is mildly related. I'm sure the people who made the video don't drink coke just like me--but for different reasons apparently. More than likely, they're vegetarians, as well-- but again, for different reasons